Narcissistic Sundays #23: Modesto, Final installment...at last!!

Settling in Modesto was not easy for me. I really felt like I was torn up by my roots. Now, nearly 9 years later, I STILL feel that way. I miss all the beadshops where I used to teach. I miss being able to go to Santa Cruz on a spur of the moment just because I felt like it. I miss going up to San Francisco because I had nothing better to do. I miss going to the Art and Wine Festivals until I got so sick of them that I could puke.

Modesto seems to be a no-man’s land. There is a Whole Foods in Sacramento and in Fresno. It seems to have avoided Modesto like the plague. Panera (a wonderful bakery), can be found in Stockton and to the south of Modesto, but apparently yeast won’t rise in Modesto. Chipotle’s is hot and spicey up in Manteca, and down in Turlock, but it can't seem to find its sizzle here. It seems so much happens outside of Modesto, but for some reason, not here. And this is not a small city. There are over 200,000 here.

Modesto is in the top 25 car theft cities in the nation, it is the meth capital of CA. Modesto had the distinction of being the 2nd (or 3rd depending on which study you are reading) of the worst places to live in the US, following our neighbor Stockton to the north. Oh…and I think the unemployment rate is hovering at around 15%. It is said that there are only three things to do in Modesto. Drink, Go to Church and Screw. And apparently it is said that the screwing isn’t so good in Modesto either. As for the other 2 choices…well, I guess I am not a drinker…and my personal religion…well…maybe that’s another topic but at the present, it does not involve a church.

I could go on and on with my list of why I am not happy in Modesto, but frankly, I would put myself in such a blue funk if I were to really itemize each and every point. I would rather focus on the positive.

The cost of living is cheaper here.

Ummm…..the cost of living is cheaper here.

Ok…I am THINKING….give me a moment. I will come up with another positive point…

Did I mention that the cost of living is cheaper here?

I guess I will leave it at that.

And make the best of what I have.

To continue with a more positive attitude, I have settled in as much as I can. I have found a way to be happy that involves escaping Modesto when I can. I take comfort in the love I have for my daughter and my pride in her when she graduated from UC Davis with her BA, and just recently with her MA in Education. She walked across the very same stage I did when I earned my degree. Being a child in a one parent household, she beat the odds. She is a success. She is my pride and joy.



Steve is still with me. He works hard on my website. He's an all around good guy. We have our challenges. He lost his job several years back, and has had a significant health problem that may keep him from working again. It makes it tough on me to hold full financial responsibility once again for someone other than myself and Jasmine, but I trudge bravely onward. I do what I can, and try to do what I can do the best way possible.

I hope to keep beading and creating. I hope to keep blogging, especially on topics to make you laugh or inspire you, or even help you, And of course the occasional full blown rant.  I hope to keep traveling, since it is my yearly escape from Modesto to explore the world!

For those of you who have been following this self absorbed “Saga” for the past 22 weeks, I hope you have enjoyed it. I hope you have found some sort of inspiration from it, since that was the main reason I started you on this journey. Magazines be damned…since they had no interest in telling you any of it in their bead-artist articles. Maybe if you feel like things are tough and you just can’t go forward, think of some of the challenges I faced, and know that if I made it through it all, you can too. All you need to do, is believe in yourself. If you need a little encouragement, let me know! I will cheer you on, from the bottom of my heart.

I guess I have you caught up to date fairly well. Of course, we go forward from here, for the most part. While my "Story" is finished with the "Narcissistic Sundays", it certainly is not over, otherwise I would be "pushing up daisies". I hope that you will stay with me as my "Story" continues here on this blog, day by day (or as often as I can post). I hope it will continue to be interesting!

And now…I have to think of what the heck to write about on Sundays!! ;)