Samples

Have you ever opened your mail box to find a package unexpectedly? I did just yesterday. It’s not my birthday, or even close to it. I did not order anything. None of my family members were expecting anything either. But there was this box, addressed to me (or current occupant), and it is a good sized box. It is roughly 8.5 X 11 inches, by 1 inch thick. Hmmm…???

Oh….wow!!! Just what I always wanted. Samples of feminine protection! Maybe they read my blog on “My Morning Shopping Needs”. I don’t really want to revisit that subject, but I cannot help but be amused. Oh I know, it doesn’t take much for me to become amused, but wouldn’t you be amused to get a box of 6 different types of feminine protection? One to suite any sort of occasion! How amused would you be if you no longer needed them? They could have at least provided suggestions for alternate uses:

The square packets are great for:

• Window washing
• Dusting
• Cushioning for packing
• Tape to forehead as protection should you fall asleep at work and hit your head on the desk
• Strap on to use as knee pads
• Brazier (female) or jean (male) “enhancers” (do I really need to explain?)

The Cigar shaped packages contain items good for:

• Stopping nose bleads
• Plugging up holes in plumbing
• An aid to start a BBQ
• Hang by the chord to amuse the cat
• Missiles to be used with a sling shot.
• Soak in gasoline to use in warfare. Note the short fuse….
• An interesting tie

As I said, I don’t want to revisit my earlier post on this subject. What I do want to delve into are “free product samples”. I am sure you have received some in the mail, as I have. I have received samples of toothpaste, dish detergent, laundry detergent, make up, panty hose (not in my size), pens, cat food (when I did not have a cat), greeting cards, note pads, cereal and the list goes on. Does someone out there really think that a sample of laundry detergent that only does about ½ of a load will sway me to buy their product? Or will panty hose (not in my size) will make me run out and buy that brand (Oh, I must try it! It feels so nice, if only it were in my size!). Maybe the cat food sample was really an effort to try to get me to adopt a cat. (Gee, I have the food, if only I had a cat!!).

I wonder why it is, that I always get useless samples. Aside from the household and feminine items I regularly get samples of, I also get samples of magazines with the “special subscription offer”. Why do they send me them, when I already subscribe? The only reason I can think, is that they have so many left over, they need to get rid of them. They must have figured out that I am prone to lose things. One magazine I subscribe to, sent me a free issue every month for a full year. It was not a double mailing, since one always had a cover on it that said “Free Trial Issue!! See inside for Special Subscription Offer!”

How about those samples at stores? You know the one. The big Mega Package Store. You go in and there are old ladies wearing hairnets and surgical gloves at every corner cooking something

in a little toaster oven or electric skillet. If you play it right, a visit to the Mega Package Store is like going to a buffet. Just scope out where the appetizers, then the entrees and then the desert items are located. Make sure you have a floor plan of the store and a good pencil, then plan your route accordingly. A couple visits at each station should become a multi coursed free meal for the whole family!

The trouble in planning out your free buffet is that everyone crowds around these little sampling stations like starved vultures as soon as something comes out of that little oven or off of the electric skillet. They barely let the grey haired lady cut the bite sized portions before they swipe it away from her. You really need to be aggressive. But tell me, did you really go in that store for that sample? Did you say to your husband or wife “hey honey, lets go to the Mega Package store to try something from Louise who stands between aisles 12 and 13 to see what she is offering today”? No…I bet you didn’t, but while you were there, and if she offered you deep fried plutonium on a stick, you would sample it, wouldn’t you? Admit it!

What I would like to see is samples I would REALLY be interested in. I spend much more money on beads than I do on the useless items they send me for free. Why don’t I get samples of the new Miyuki Delica Bead colors when they come out? Why do I not get samples of new threads? Or new needles? Why do I not get a free beading program when I have been asked to evaluate one or give the developer some advice instead of a short term free access that I cannot even print from? I would also like samples of storage items. Nothing big, mind you, but how about some small boxes or containers. I am always interested in exploring different storage methods.

There are some bead suppliers that send a little “Thank You” gifts. I find that to be a nice touch, even though the “gift” is usually totally useless. It’s kinda like finding the toy at the bottom of a cereal box or a cracker jack box. It amuses me for a few seconds and then I never play with it again. Frankly, I would rather have a free sample of shipping.

Another bead supplier I like really does give me samples that are worthwhile! I love ordering from them, just to see what they send me. They usually send me about 10 small packets of different seed beads, and even Aiko beads. Just enough to see the color and quality. And at times it was just what I needed to use in a project. This tactic really got me to order more beads! I have to admit, once I got to see and use the pretty colors they sent me, I wanted …well NEEDED more. Their free samples actually work on me. They do get me to order more.

I hope some marketing people in bead companies are reading this. My mailbox is presently empty and waiting for some great bead samples! Send me something good, and I will bet I will whip out my well worn plastic and spend some well worn money!!

Anyone want the box of samples that was sent to me yesterday?? ;)